


Diadan Falling

by Lul_A_Bird



Series: Living 5560 [1]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F, Lot of death, Nazi Space Spiders, Science Fiction, WW2 inspired, War Drama, crazy ride
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-12
Updated: 2018-05-12
Packaged: 2019-05-05 15:17:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14621447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lul_A_Bird/pseuds/Lul_A_Bird
Summary: Our sovereignty will not fail, our might will not be challenged. My son's will push into the deep expanse and consume all that stands between us and our glory. Hear me now "Free men" we do not fear death as you do, and we do not care that you fear oblivion. You claim us to be an infestation, your words mean nothing. Come to my land, spill our blood, sully our ground with your filthy feet and show us that we are vermin. Tear out our innards, pluck out our eyes lest we do so to you. Seek my fang, seek my glory, I welcome your blood in our home.





	Diadan Falling

**Author's Note:**

> OH hey, I'm taking this on after the chapter went up. I noticed the spacing is kinda far apart, it wasn't like that on my document, to me it makes it look odd but some people may think it's easier to read it this way. Any input, should I change it or leave it?

**Diamond Fleet, 3 battlecruisers, 5 cruisers, 15 corvettes and 25 naval battleships, the second responder to the Diadan invasion as well as Peridots assigned fleet. High Admiral Ker’yeta’fai a Trekkopod male commands this fleet.**

  
  


_**Chapter One** _

_**Diamond in the Rough** _

  
  
  
  


Peridot made her way down the busy but not overly crowded streets of Disson. She, like many other pedestrians, was burying her face in the high collar of her jacket in an attempt to block out the bitter winter wind. Her jacket, which was a knee length brown engineer coat, did well to keep out the elements but the snow had a tendency to stick to the thick fabric. 

 

_ ‘I miss geoengineered planetary climates... the appeal of this “natural” weather beyond me. Who wants the sky to constantly dump shit on their head?’  _ Peridot angrily trudged on, wishing she could at least stop her teeth from chattering.

 

Or maybe her heart from pounding.

 

_ ‘Where the fuck is a public shuttle when you actually needed the pieces of shit.’  _ she scanned the side of the road for said grey and black shuttle cars.

 

She wasn't normally this angry, but anxiety plus freezing cold temperatures hasn't been helping her attitude all that much. 

 

‘ _ Maybe this isn't the night…’ said the smaller more fragile voice in her head. _

 

_ ‘No, if you say that now you'll continue to say it forever. Your doing this.’  _ once again the more irritated and longer repressed Peridot swiftly claimed one of many victories today. 

 

In fact, part of her feels she may have gone to far this time, but she was far too invested now to back down. ‘ _ It all rides on tonight Peridot, don't mess it up.’  _

 

She was so caught up in her internal struggle that she almost passed a public shuttle parked on the side of the road. 

 

With a sigh of relief Peridot swung the door open and dropped into the back. The air inside was air conditioned and dry to her relief, as that wasn't always the case. 

 

“Hold the shuttle please ma’am!!” Peridot froze just before slamming the door shut, groaning internally. Now she had to deal with strangers. Glancing back from where she came from she saw a tall (6’ ish) avian Xeno with a red and grey feathered head and medium length bulky beak. His clothing were certainly foreign, a set of thick  but well decorated robes that were layered for cold weather. Even in the GU this was not one she saw everyday. 

 

Shaking off her shock at the sight, she scooted over in the shuttle to let him in. His feet were black talons, three long toes in front and one in back only slightly shorter. Lucky for Peridot and the stranger there was plenty of leg space in the shuttle.

 

His hands resembled his feet in color and appearance but instead had three fingers and a thumb with short claws extending about an inch. 

 

_ ‘Hope he's friendly.’  _ Peridot thought to herself as the alien shut the door and dropped his hood at once. They seemed to be covered in feathers entirely save for hands and… talons. 

 

“thank you human… I'm going to Center Quin, terrible walk.” He spoke with a strange accent lispy but… not the same. It was odd, almost like the light hissing was just part of their speech. 

 

She didn't know how to react. The solution? React like nothing was out of the ordinary. GU standard, neutral. 

 

“That's kinda far, I'm in a hurry.” Peridot tried her best not to sound aggressive, just desperate. 

 

“Oh no that's fine I'm in no rush.” The avian looked at her and sudo smiles at the very ends of his beak where it met his cheek. “What rushes you?” 

 

Peridot struggled with whether or not to answer that. “80’80’12 Silver skyway Neptune center.” was all she said. To the computer manning the vehicle. 

 

“Ahh, I see…” he quietly muttered “Death rushes you.” 

 

That made Peridot’s heart stop, ‘ _ how had he recognized the street address?’ _

 

Peridot didn't answer, both too grumpy and shocked to come up with a reply. 

 

They remained quite as the computer booted up the shuttle and they began lift off. They turned onto the skyway and began moving with the flow of traffic high in the air for quite some time before the xeno spoke again. 

 

“I'm a Slethlian, my name is Dar’kalan. We are largely a reclusive but peaceful race who rarely involve themselves in internal galactic matters. I've seen the look you gave me before. First time seeing one in person?” The breaking of silence just seemed to irritate Peridot, she wasn't in the mood for small talk. 

 

“Yeah… First time. Look, no offence but I've got a lot on my mind so can we cut the small talk?” Peridot tried to not sound like a bitch, but how can you shut someone up without it?

 

“Not long ago I met my first human, you come in so few colors and solid too. Not to mention these mouths of yours.” The Slethlian hummed in amusement, “On our world beakless things with lips are considered to be meek and cuddly but that does not accurately describe many humans.” Peridot felt a twinge of annoyance as the xeno ignored her and kept talking.

 

“Yes, the Galactic Union is a wonderful place full of diversity and acceptance, But it pales in comparison to my homeworlds. Much quieter, much greener too, I miss my home dearly.” Peridot couldn't help but sympathies with that. She misses home too.

 

“Then why not go back?” Peridot knew little about what lay behind the Slethlian borders due to their isolationist ideals, but she knew it wasn't in deep space. Cross-planet travel was essentially daylight robbery but if one was determined it wouldn’t be difficult to return to his homeland.

 

“Diaden’s have been threatening our borders, I'm here because of growing tensions between us and the Diaden empire. We… hope to find military support from the GU in fighting off their calls for invasion.” 

 

Peridot looked at him, with an incredulous look. “A diplomat, here, in the streets? Shouldn't you be on Kallkamon with an armed escort?”

 

Dar shrugged, “Mayhaps, yet I am here without even a sidearm to my name.” They fell silent again. The cryptic answer provided just hung in the air making Peridot even more uncomfortable. 

 

“The Diaden’s are more capable warrior's than your proud government makes them out to be.” Dar broke the silence after about three minutes.

 

“What are you getting at, ‘Dar’?” Peridot has had about enough if the creepy bird aliens vagueness. Diplomat or not, he was getting under her skin. 

 

“It's fair warning… from one deadman to another” Peridot’s expression changed to confused. That was until Dar’kalan reached up to the centerfold of his robe and pushed it aside. Across his feathered chest was several bald spots with strange circular scars counting five in all. 

 

“Just keep in mind what you got to lose. Being a soldier isn't as glorious as they preach.” The Slethlian turned back to the window in front of them, watching the traffic zip by.

 

Peridot thought about it for awhile. The military wasn't the first choice but here she was. 

 

“I want to be a soldier because I don't got anything to lose.” she didn't know why she was defending herself to a stranger, but once again… here she was. 

 

“Hmmm, I see. Lost all worth here?” Dar questioned without looking at her. 

 

“Things aren’t going so well with my girlfriend, moved from home, changed my career, left my planet...” Peridot trailed off. She didn't want to think about this so soon after it happened. 

 

“So your response to a break up is usually to jump head first into danger?" Dar’Kala sounded almost amused.

 

Peridot sighed, “We didn’t break up.” The Slethlian cocked his head in a typically bird like fashion. 

 

“Seems like an odd relationship.” Was his short reply. The shuttle pulled up to its first destination and Peridot was mentally bracing herself for the cold. 

 

“Well lucky me, I don’t have to sit here and explain it to you.” It came out a little sharper than she had intended, but Dar seemed unfazed anyway. Peridot threw the door open when the shuttle parked in one of the few empty spaces left in the large parking lot of her destination. Before getting out she looked back at Dar and said, “Look I appreciate the warning, but… I need this. We’d be shuttling around all day if I tried to explain it to you.” 

 

As she got out and closed the door she could hear Dar from inside, “Ha, I remember being twenty, just make sure you get to remember it later yourself.” She didn’t respond to the last part, the door was already closed and she was already walking away.

 

_ ‘The Diaden army is half as advanced as the GU, how bad can it be?’  _ Peridot told herself as she scaled the steps at the base of a large six story complexe with the sign, “Galactic Union Recruitment and Deployment Center”

 

* * *

  
  
  


**Kalshar (Cal-Shar) Peridot’s homeworld. It’s a C-class geoengineered planet whos primary export is complexe ship components and architectural devices. Because it is manufactured, it experiences few weather famonina due to the small army of AI’s keeping the climate under total control. A feat only accomplishable on Geoengineered planets**

  
  
  


The silence around her was shattered instantly by the familiar sound of three low beeps which would repeat on cycle until she did what it wanted. Peridot didn’t wait to feel how tired her body was from the deep sleep, she just threw herself out of the thin sheets and immediately began rearranging the sheets to make the bed look perfect. Just like she’s been doing for the past nine months, and just as soon as she was done with it she stood at attention near the foot of the bed. 

 

Her eyes were still adjusting to the bright overhead lights of the infantry barracks that turn on shortly after the wake up bell. Many soldiers stood in identical positions, upright, feet at a forty five degree angle and shoulder length apart. Hands clasped in front or behind. 

 

There was silence amongst many men and women the room, no one daring to make the slightest unnatural sound. It stayed like this for quite some time, Peridot struggling to not let the gentle hum of the massive battle cruiser lul her back to sleep. 

 

One minute passed, two minutes pass then five. This was a weirdly long time to wait, normally the officers would be in here barking orders in the seconds following the bell. 

 

Just as people were beginning to relax, an officer finally walked slowly through the automated doors to the barracks. ‘ _ Why does he look so pale?’ _ Peridot worriedly thought. 

 

“Soldiers, get into your uniforms and meet in atrium seven for an emergency briefing. We’ve… found the enemy.” Peridot’s heart jumped in her throat when the crew commander said this. The invasion of Diaden territory had been going very well when she was in training, but not long after she was deployed to ‘The Profit’ most if not all enemy fleets had vanished. No planetary defenses, no military resistance and even no civilians. Planet after Planet was found to be fully abandon, with any sort of useful information or resources missing. 

 

Peridot knew it was a trap, hell everyone knew it was probably a trap, but the GU was convinced that the technological and number advantage they had over them would be more than enough to handle anything the Diaden army could throw at them. But no one is super keen on being the ones to prove them right. 

 

Without saying another word the officer signaled for everyone to start moving and left. Presumably to meet them at atrium seven. Now free to move, Peridot knelt by her bed and opened the footlocker next to it. Robotically she stripped off her sleepwear, exposing her body to the entire room, something she was only okay with because everyone in the room was expected to do the same. 

 

First, the Ottar suit; a skin tight long sleeved undershirt with knee length shorts, both made of a thick black elastic type fabric. The undershirt hugged the body sturdily and also notably helped keep breasts out of the way and under control. 

 

Second was the fautiges; most soldiers in the room had green, white and black military fatigues but Peridot was a combat engineer and had a black uniform with green details to show this. 

Next would be to put on her platings, which would take some time, but luckily for her these were not needed unless she was going to be shot at. Boy she hopped that wasn’t happening today. Once dressed, she made sure that everything else about her was presentable before joining many others in filling off to the atriums. 

 

Once there, the hundreds of soldiers began to fill the seats of the atrium. It was a very large room with a high roof and fifty by fifty rows of seats positioned in a half circle around a small stage like area for speakers and the large screens that dominated the opposite wall. There were already several officers seated in the center of the atrium, waiting for them all to be seated. She could see where here crew master was, indicating the row meant of them. Hundreds of soldiers piled in and sat down in their respective row, ready to hear the bad news. 

 

Admiral Dylo, an Azphalien man with black military a standard haircut stepped up to the microphone. Which was really just a floating circular device suspended in the air by anti grav tech Peridot wouldn’t want me to try and explain on my own. 

 

“Soldiers, as your officers may have informed you already, Galactic Union forces have met the enemy. It has come to no surprise where the enemy is, however that isn’t the bad news.” The screens behind him lit up, showing a large grey, blue and brown rock with eight oddly shaped moons. After a short inspection of the same image in the holodesk, a clear glasslike surface that worked essentially like a  3D touch screen and well... a desk, she could further inspect the strange moons.

 

The moons weren’t any normal satellite, they were synthetic superstructures orbiting the planet, ‘ _ What are those, defences? No spacefaring civilization would put structures this large in orbit of a civilized planet, it would wreak havoc on their gravitational pull.’ _ That was when Peridot glanced at the numbers in the top right corner. 

 

Diadan; Diaden homeworld 

49% 40% Ox

9.912 m/s²

240,455.35 Dmt 

 

Peridot’s jaw went a little slack. This planet was huge, it should have over five times the standard survivable gravitational limit, yet somehow the planet was only a little over optimal gravitational pull.  

 

“This is Diadan, and as some of you may have already noticed those aren’t natural satellites. We aren’t looking at weapons either though, in fact they are there to artificially regulate gravity on the planet. This allows for a much larger planet like this one to support life, and this is the bad news.” He stopped to clear his throat for a moment, “This morning we received word that the High Admiral of the Ithiriod Fleet, that’s a day old, detailing the initial scans of planets surface and the results are troubling. They believe that every Diaden soldier and civilian from each of their outer colonies retreated to their massive homeworld for a final stand.” He explained with a calm a collected tone. 

 

‘ _ There’s no way that’s their homeworld, capital maybe, but that thing wouldn’t have supported life before they got to it. They designed a planet to be huge… why? Was it for this exact reason, were they expecting to be invaded by an entity this large so early in their space age?”  _  Peridot had a lot of questions really, but she wasn’t about to go raising her hand.

 

“We have no way of knowing just how many of them are prepared to die for that planet down there.” That gave Peridot a worrying thought. How nationalistic were their people? To be honest most normal people knew very little about the race. Ithiriad saw actual combat so some people there have seen them, but she’s never heard one’s personal account. The GU just kept telling them that their people were slave drivers and warlords and that’s just about all they knew about their government. She did however know what one was supposed to look like, seeing as how she shot at targets identical in shape to them for nearly a month to learn vitals. 

 

In fact she knew them anatomically very well, courtesy of her training. 

 

But courtesy of her luck and horror they were Arachnid. To be fair, they actually had ten legs if you counted the short ones under their mandibles that they use as hands. A four eyed, ten legged, hairy tarantula thats half your height on all eights. Because their body is so awkward they are unable to use rifles, so instead every soldier is armed with one of two standard weapons. 

 

A laser cannon, which reacts explosively and fires a projectile roughly the size of a loaf of bread. 

 

Then there's the plasma anti infantry repeater, which was essentially a minigun designed to blast marble sized balls of hot plasma into a crowd. 

 

Both weapons could never be operated by her or any other non Diaden soldier, because it’s designed to sit between the thorax and the abdomen pointed over the left, right, or both sides its head. The firing mechanism would reach around the body and his thorax to reach the two extra short legs in front. 

 

Terrifying, evil, but other than that a mystery. 

 

The dream she was having suddenly came back to her. It was strange, mostly because it’s not what really happened. What pertained to this however was the addition of a Slethlian, yet another race she’s seen plenty of images of but never really interacted with. That ‘Dar’ warned her that the Galactic union was underestimating the Diaden’s, which made sense for a Slethlian to say. After all they were being overrun with them. 

 

It just freaked her out, but she tried to chalk it up to coincidence and figured she heard one speaking on the news at one point.

 

‘ _ That’s it, gotta be.’ _

 

“Ithiriad also told us that all forces are being redirected to Diadan for reinforcements because after launching a localized strike to open up a potential planetary hub the fleet was ambushed by a hidden Diaden fleet which now has them locked in a vicious space battle near orbit (Not in orbit) which has proven dangerous. Much of Ithiriad fleet is divided and  ground combat is seeing no reinforcements so we need to punch a hole in their blockade and launch a two part battle, in space where we fight to keep an open link between the cruisers and the invasion fleet and on ground to secure a base of operations to begin hitting anti naval defenses. If we succeed in both the Ithiriad fleet should survive to see Valsakka Fleet. Once they arrive, we have no doubt that space battle will be secured. And of course with air superiority it’ll only be a matter of time before victory.”    
  


Peridot's eyes bulged in her head, and she wasn't the only one. One soldier stood too his feet, and without waiting for permission to speak yelled, “Wait, so Ithiriad jumps the gun and gets slaughtered so our plan is to do the same shit!” 

 

Almost immediately his Crew Commander barked at him to sit down, but he was interrupted when Dylo began speaking over him, “I know you all are very scared, but before Ithiriad was alone and unprepared, we are neither and soon we’ll vastly outnumber their fleet. If you can fight valiantly and remove those ANC’s then we can insure the ground invasions success in matter of months.” The words sounded logical but it didn't seem to make it not sound crazy. 

 

Peridot has never heard of an entire species, civilians and all, taking up arms in a war. Not to mention all of them on one big planet, which was impossible to her thirty minutes ago. The scale of that army had to be unimaginably large. Sure it was still a fraction of the GU but all in one spot? Literally unheard of. 

 

The rest of the day was kind of a blur to Peridot. It was a lot of briefings and checking all their equipment. Counting ammunition, a lot of it, then counting the guns. You get the idea, battle preparations which they all normally found tedious. However today it felt like everyone wanted them to last forever. Taking their time to be absolutely sure there was 2,000 rounds in that box, or that their rifle was fine tuned. 

 

Lunch couldn't come fast enough. 

 

And when it did, Peridot was frustratingly unapatiesed. She just picked at her food and wondered if Ida heard about first contact. You never knew when the GU would televise that sort of thing. 

 

Then again she was out of Union space so either way it could be a week before she knows. 

 

_ ‘I could be dead by then.’  _ The thought sent a chill down her spine. 

 

“Hey doom eyes, you gonna eat that?” Peridot turned to the spot on her right. It was a woman, a Beta specifically, and had dark skin which starkly contrasted to own Peridot’s pale complexion. Peridot stuck out like a sore thumb because her family retained strong irish genes, not that anybody gave her issues about it, but it did bring a lot of attention to her. Not to mention some people found it… exotic. Speaking of enticing things.

 

The woman asking for her food wasn’t bad on the eyes, short wavy light purple hair, curvy body, lush lips, and sharp purple eyes. It doesn’t look at all like a soldiers body to Peridot, but from the looks of her thighs she had to be in pretty damn good shape. 

 

“Um, I-I guess not.” Peridot stuttered, pushing the plate toward her. ‘ _ Smooth start.’ _

 

“Awesome!” She pulled the plate close and immediately began shoveling food in her mouth as quick as she could. 

 

Peridot watched in shock and awe as the woman inhaled the chicken and Shalk, the corn, five Rinaak tenders and a carton of milk in probably less than three minutes. “Jesus, do they feed you in your company!” 

 

The girl burped and patted her stomach, “Same time as everyone else!” She said confidently. For a moment Peridot just gave her a funny look, but with all of  the eventually she overpowered the gloom and managed to crack a smile and giggle.

 

“What’s so funny, don’t believe me?” She crossed her arms and smirked at Peridot. 

 

“No, no I believe you, I just didn’t expect… you to.. Who are you?” The woman looked familiar, she just couldn’t put a finger on it.  

 

“Starving apparently, who are you?” Peridot blinked as the girl laughed at her own joke shortly.

 

‘ _ Two can play the smartass game.’  _ Peridot thought to herself before replying “Doom eyes apparently.” 

 

The girl took a brief second to recall what she had called Peridot before they began talking, then bust out into another much longer laughing fit. Peridot honestly didn’t think it was that good but she was flattered.

 

After she was done having her laugh she locked eyes with Peridot, “All right, I like you. Names Amethyst, Amethyst Kinder.” 

 

“Huh, no way.” Peridot let a smile break across her face when she heard the name, “What a coincidence, my name is Peridot.”

 

“Two gems on Diamond fleet, what are the odds?” Peridot was pleased to see she seemed just happy about that as she was. It was an odd name, Peridot, but it was unique and she’s never renounced it. “Peridot, cute name…”

  
  


* * *

  
  


**A “Beta” human is not below an “Alpha” human. A Beta human is the result of hundreds of years without borders separating humans. They are such a mix of genes that it makes it kinda hard to classify them as any one in particular. they are also the vast majority of the human population with 78% of all humans being classified as “Beta.”**

  
  
  


Being a combat engineer, she had access to certain little nooks and crannies in the ship. The ships had huge networks of maintenance access point and some of them are actually pretty roomy. Take for example the air ventilation systems, the terminal room for it was just a medium sized empty metal room with great a.c. The only thing Peridot had used them for in the past is for maintenance. However other engineer would talk about using them to have sex outside of the ranks view. 

 

And for the first time since she started here, so was she.

 

She would be lying if she said she knew this is what the conversation would lead too, and honestly she wasn't sure if it was the right thing to do. She might die, it's probably normal to act so erratically. 

 

Peridot was pushed against the back panel of the terminal, which was wide and angular making it nice to lean on. Amethyst had one knee between Peridot’s thighs and they were liplocked for probably the last four or five minutes. 

Peridot’s fatigue top was already off and Amethyst’s pants were practically off, sitting uselessly around one ankle. This was happening, and honestly Peridot wasn't sure she should be letting it happen. 

 

Things were heating up quickly and Amethyst was getting very comfortable. If the stripping of her otter suits top was any indication. Peridot’s heart was pounding hard, in her chest and throat. It was almost suffocating. 

 

Amethyst’s hands begin to trace Peridot’s hips, and the curve of her breasts. 

 

Then one hand slipped under her shorts, and brushed against her core. 

 

It was a short fleeting touch, but it was vastly overwhelming to her. Breaking the passionate kiss Peridot nervously began whispering. “I'm sorry, I'm sorry I can't.” It was extremely embarrassing for Peridot to be doing this but she couldn't help it. She needed a second to stop her constantly pounding heart. 

 

Amethyst was extremely quick to retract her hand from Peridot’s undergarments and take a small step back. “I'm sorry, too fast?” She said in a hurried and worried tone. 

 

Peridot, struggling to keep her heart from bursting from her chest, nodded. “Just,” a deep breath, “a little. I'm sorry I just… I have a girlfriend and today's been kinda emotional. It's just happening so fast I...” The tears welled up surprisingly quickly in her eyes and before she could stop she was sobbing. 

 

Amethyst looked on with a mix of horror and concern. Horror because part of her still believes she somehow caused this. “We're about to go to war, it's not wrong to want some intimacy, you shouldn't feel bad.” She tried. 

 

Peridot only sobbed a little harder, and Amethyst cringed. She decided instead to gather their scattered clothes and make herself decent again. Peridot didn't move to put on the cloths given to her, instead sliding down the back of the terminal until her head rested on her knees. 

 

After putting her clothes on Amethyst sat next to Peridot and patiently waited for her to calm down. About two minutes later, Peridot fell so silent and still that Amethyst was hesitant to disturb her even then. Instead Amethyst reached into her uniforms left thigh pocket and pulled out a tin pack of E-cigarettes. She pulled out a short cigarette sized stick (A 100, for those of you who know what that means) made out of a plastic like material and a sperat small metal filter. 

 

Amethyst popped the cap off one end of the cigarette and attached the filter to it. She put it to her lips and took a long drag. After, she huffed out a cloud of vapours that floated lazily down to the ground before disappearing completely. This seemed to get Peridot’s attention because she finally lifted her head from her knees and eyed the nicotine filled device with red puffy eyes.

 

“Uh,” she started weakly, “Could I have one of those?” Her voice was small and shaky, just barely above a whisper. 

 

Amethyst held the tin toward her with a gentle smile. “You didn’t strike me as the type.” 

 

Peridot sighed as she pulled one out for herself, along with the spare filter. “Only sometimes.” She answered shortly. They sat there in silence for a while, puffing off their individual cancer stick and contemplating life. “I’m sorry…” Peridot finally broke the silence after about two minutes. 

 

“For?” Amethyst said with a light chuckle in her voice. 

 

“Being weird and having a breakdown in the middle of sex.” The engineer looked crestfallen at the ground, careful to avoid the worried gaze of the girl next to her. 

 

At first, Amethyst wasn’t sure how to respond. “Well,” She paused as she planned her words carefully, “I think everyone is a little shaken right now. Seriously, it’s okay.” 

 

Peridot let a short but dark chuckle escape her conscious, “Okay? I’m about to be knee deep in shit, and for what? To prove I’m not a coward?” Amethyst tilted her head slightly at that, but wasn’t sure if Peridot would appreciate prodding. Peridot however seemed to notice, or at least figured, that Amethyst was curious.

 

‘ _ why not? Now is the worst time to keep secrets.’ _ Peridot told herself. 

 

After taking a moment to collect herself, she began speaking in an emotionless tone.

 

“I’ve been with Ida for almost four years now. We started right after we left the engineering academy. She convinced me to move, change my career path, leave my friends for her’s” She paused to take a tense drag off her cigarette, “and I never questioned it. But one day, after we had a big fight, I realized that I felt inferior to her. I felt like I wasn’t her equal, I was her novelty. I did what she said and told myself it was because I loved her, and that was just how relationships were. So as an act of defiance I…” Peridot let another dark chuckle fall from her lips, “I went and picked up recruitment papers. I don’t think I was serious about it then, I just wanted to scare her.” 

 

A lonely tear streaked down her face now. Amethyst, who was remaining politely quiet and attentive up till now, finally spoke. “You thought she would stop you.” She said softly.

 

“She didn’t even seem fazed when I told her that night. She just smiled and told me to do whatever I thought was right. I was confused, and even started to question if maybe I was misreading the situation. Maybe she didn’t want to control me and I just kinda… allowed it to happen.” Another long drag off her cigarette. Amethyst found Peridots current facial expression to be mostly unreadable, but she could see some anger in her eyes if she looked hard enough. “Then, later that night when she thought I was asleep, I overheard her talking to one her friends on her link. ‘She won’t do it, she’s been afraid of her own shadow since we were freshmen in the academy” Peridot recited the words with a surprising amount of venom.

 

“I’m not sure what came over me… I was just so mad that I left as early as I could to go to the recruitment center. I wanted to make her eat those words.” She had one fist clenching a handful of fabric from her uniform pants so hard that her hand was turning white. 

 

There was more silence, more tense waiting for Peridot to move or speak. After a moment Peridot released her uniform and sighed deeply, Amethyst could practically hear some of the stress as she did. “Then, four months into my tour, the Galactic Union declared war on the Imperial Diaden sovereignty.” 

 

Amethyst processed what she had just been told  for a bit before deciding what it was she wanted to say. “I wanted to impress someone too,” Amethyst decided this would be the most appropriate response, ‘ _ Being an idiot sucks, but it sucks less when you’re not the only idiot.’ _ She thought. “There’s this woman, her name is Pearl. You may have seen her once or twice around the fleet. She never said it, but I know she thought of me as a kid. I looked up to her so much that it kinda hurt ya know, to be treated like you can’t handle anything by the one person you want to be proud of you.” Peridot let out a low hum of agreement, but didn’t say anything. 

 

“I heard what was going down with the Diaden’s constantly, and Pearl was already out there. I don’t really know what was going through my head, I just knew that I wanted to prove myself to her and I wanted to help her fight. Not to save her, I don’t think she needs saving, but letting her just run off to fight a war felt wrong.” 

 

Peridot seemed shocked at this, if her expression was anything to go off of. “You joined knowing we were about to go to war with the Diaden empire?” Amethyst just nodded, a small smile adorning her face. Certainly not what Peridot thought she’d see her doing. 

 

“Yup, that’s me, sergeant dumbass.” Peridot didn’t really know how to respond to the surprisingly light hearted comment. Instead, she elected to finish off her cigarette and enjoy the small amount of emotional relief she’d been granted. 

 

“People do stupid shit for love” Peridot finally said after the cigarette was finished off, earning a small chuckle from Amethyst. 

  
  
  


**Azphalien (Az-fe-lien) Species: Characterized as tall slender beings with blue skin and pointed ears. Azphailien’s are the most humanoid alien out there, sharing many facial features and general body shape. Also, do not ever call them space elves.**

  
  
  


Later in the night cycle, Peridot  was seated on her bed with a laptop (The more things change, the more they stay the same) in her lap. She wished that she was more excited about the new message notification from her girlfriend, but in all honesty these video messages were sort of lackluster. It felt to Peridot that she did it as an obligation not as a way to communicate with someone she loved. Her cursor just idly hovered over the icon. ‘ _ Do I even want to?’  _ She thought as her finger lay undecided on the holographic touch pad embedded in the computer.

 

Sure, it might be the last time she receives any message of any kind. However she didn’t enjoy the prospect of responding to it. Ida would likely receive it long after Peridot lands on the planet. Something about sending Ida a message when she herself could be dead by the time she receives it made Peridot’s skin crawl and her stomach queasy. Despite all this, she did inevitably click into it to start the video. 

 

An image of her old home filled the screen. Ida, a dark skinned girl with darker freckles and light brown eyes that matched her hair, was sitting center focus at the desk which at one point was Peridot’s own. She used to find her so captivatingly beautiful, and she still was extremely pretty, but Peridot no longer found herself lost in her eyes. After what had happened, the spell she had put on Peridot seemed to just dissolve into nothingness. The engineer had struggled with these feelings, questioning if she still loved her, or if Ida loved her back. It was confusing, but she was too frightened or maybe even lonely to bring it up even now. 

 

Actually, especially now. 

“Hey, P-dot it’s Ida, duh.” She said with an airy laugh, “Today is Thursday the twenty second of April.” About three weeks ago, which was the information speed’s usual delay although this would sometimes differ. “Things have been pretty alright down here, kinda sucks you aren’t here to go to the Phyoxis’ anniversary party. You know how weird I feel going places alone.” Phyoxis was a company they both used to work at. “I think I’ve said it a hundred times but it’s so quiet without you here.”

 

The majority of the message continued as one might expect. Ida listed off various things that have been happening in her life, what here friends were doing and how her job was. Normally this didn’t bother Peridot, but at this moment it just felt strange listening to such mundane things when everything here was so frightening. She spent most the video in her thoughts, formulating how she was supposed to respond to this. She still wasn’t sure when the video came to it’s close. 

 

“Well, I hope things are okay over there. The news says that you guys are meeting hardly any resistance. Fingers crossed you don’t even have to shoot that rifle huh?” That made Peridot’s stomach flip. ‘ _ Guess she didn’t knock on wood.’ _ Said the darker part of her mind that was finding some humor in this.

 

“We’re all rooting for you P-dot, stay safe babe.” With a short sweet smile, and a wave goodbye, the screen darkened and froze. Options to reply, replay or back out prompted itself onto the screen and demanded she make her choice. 

 

Unsure of what she was going to say, Peridot hit reply anyway. Hoping that she’d find her words when she was put on the spot. This time, the screen filled with her own face. A red blinking dot in the corner of the screen told her that it was recording, but for the first six or so seconds all she could do was watch that dot. 

“Hey… Ida.” Peridot finally said, focusing her gaze on the camera. “I’m happy things are okay over there, and I’m sorry you have to…” She trailed off. ‘ _ What am I doing? Just cut to the chase Peridot, this won’t get any easier if you stall.’ _

 

“I’m sorry, I can’t think about parties or work… or friends right now.” She took a deep breath. ‘ _ Like a bandaid’ _ she coached herself, hoping to get this over with. “I’m going to be landing on Diadan in a few days and uh.” A nervous laugh, “How do I word this?”

 

‘ _ Bluntly’ _ Said her inner voice once again, and once again it was right. “I don’t know what’s going to happen to me by the time you get this.” It was an odd way to put it, but how else was she supposed to say it? She could feel tears begin to well up in her eyes, “I’m sorry, I’m not good at goodbye’s. Just, I don’t know, take care of yourself and Fizz.” Her voice was wavering and cracking violently by the end of the sentence. The tears were blurring her vision, so she couldn’t see the wreck that was currently her face very well. 

 

For a bit, Peridot couldn’t think of what else to say, so she just continued to look pathetic on camera until she finally choked out a strained, “I’m sorry.” This time, she didn’t give the apology context, mostly because she herself wasn’t sure what she was apologizing for. 

 

She just cut off the recording, unable or unwilling to continue the message. Peridot debated even sending the video for a moment until deciding it would be best to send out the last of her messages regardless of quality. It may be the last thing she says to any of these people.

 

_ ‘Oh god.’ _ Peridot had forgotten until now that this wasn’t the only one of these video’s she’d have to send out. What about her old friends or worse, her mother? She had a rather rocky relationship with her mom but not so bad that she would run off to die without telling her. 

 

‘ _ At least it’ll make sense when you start apologizing randomly’ _ She hovers her cursor over her mother's profile and clicked into it. Still unsure of where to start.

 

‘ _ We’ll just have to wing it again.’ _

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> A.N. Well here is the first chapter, let’s see how people take to this. It is… odd. Now for those who care, this is a Lapidot fic but romance doesn’t take the front seat, this is mostly a war drama. Oh and I’m sure your ocd eyes probably spotted that a lot of the times my apostrophe before a thought will be oddly spaced ( ‘ example’). I do not know how to fix this but I’d love too if anyone knows how. Any questions about anything I’d be happy to answer and reviews are welcome, don’t be afraid to let know how you feel good or bad. ANYway I gotta move on, so thanks for your time and a moment of consideration.
> 
> PS I’m looking for Beta readers if anyone is interested.
> 
> You are reading version 1.2 if your wondering why I’m keeping count… then you have a wonderful question. I guess I think it’s helpful for people to know if it’s changed.


End file.
